Peaks to Valleys

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Carefree to careworn overnight. It’s been coming for a while; another rolling wave crashing upon a peaceful shore, threatening the careful facade, and fragile sandcastles.

The same old, same old worries and frustrations that dog us, bark alongside us, remind us of our position of lack, make it so difficult to turn that canine on its head, and find ways to express our needs and wants from a positive position.

The routinely outturned pockets, offering fluffy nothings. Holey clothes, children’s worn shoes wincing as for bike brakes. Desperate for respite.

The wave builds. The alcoholic crutch returns. The creeping excuses, and rationalizations. Building, building. Disgruntled. Self-judgment. More wine, please. More chips, please. Enabler, enabled.

And crash…

Tucked away today, in my cave. Tired. Thinking. Planning. Determined. Trying not to berate.

Dammit. Summer’s coming. Back on the clean wagon. Must to be fiercely erecting barricades all around to stop from falling off.

I hope I can still see the scenery through the gaps.

 

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2 thoughts on “Peaks to Valleys

  1. It happens. Its life. Lick your wounds. Give yourself a hug. The sun brings a new day.
    When I beat myself up the next day is full of tension. When I forgive myself i wake up and am open to whatever the day brings.
    Life is a series of highs and lows. Be grateful for the highs. Be graceful in the lows…….
    Val x

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